The World Is A Safe Place!

Do you have those moments where you don't believe what you are seeing?

Do you know that feeling when you watch something happening in front of you and think 'any moment now someone is going to jump out with a camera saying "smile you are on TV?"'.... It happened to me last week!

I was driving past the field of 12 neglected horses (see earlier posts;Kindness or turn a blind eye and Charity support down, Angels on the up), when I couldn't believe my own eyes!  All the horses were gathered quietly together, heads down in feed buckets... EATING!

Horsey people who have witnessed horses being neglected and left in fields will know the significance of this find, and understand my shock.  I drove home, dumped the car, then ran back down the road to the field.  I needed to watch and study. 

Like an undercover spy on a stakeout I hid in the hedgerow and watched.  I could see two people, walking between the horses, a man and a woman.  Its funny how by just watching how people walk and stand you can tell they are 'ok', safe to approach.   It was clear that they were familiar with horses and comfortable around them.  They had spread the buckets out at a safe distance and there was a peaceful atmosphere about the herd. 

There and then I decided I was going to go over and meet these people - whoever they were.  I ran back home, got the car and drove round to where I had recently been accessing the field out of view of the road.

A small car was parked where I park!  I climbed the gate as they were walking back and we met. 

A couple of hours later after a lot of like minded talking, we arranged to meet again - same time, same place the next day.

Turned out we had a lot in common:

- a love of horses
- our own horses
- a desire to help neglected, hungry horses
-a sense of despair and frustration at the lack of resource and hope provided by animal Charitys
-a desire to open our own 'rescue centres' if and when funds allow

etc etc.

More than that we also had a shared sense of  compassion towards animals.  We all had connections to Reiki and healing and our own stories about the amazing synchronicity of life when you are on the 'right path', such as now and finding each other helping these horses. 

Before this encounter neither of us knew of each other's existance.  Independently we had thought we were the only ones doing something! 

It just goest to show you never quite know what you DONT see!  Eyes wide shut kind of concept!  It's amazing to me, given how many times a day I pass this field, that  I never saw these people in there before.  But, nothing happens until the time is right and we are in the 'right emotional, mental space' to see it and learn from it.

What else is right infront of us waiting to be discovered?

Every day since, this chance encounter, this mother and son have turned up with 12 buckets of feed including stud mix for the pregnant mares. They arrive with haylage and spread that out for the horses.  Every day!

Seems that they used to watch and feed these horses, then, to use their words, they 'took their eye off them' and were helping another field of horses.  They had only recently  come by the field again and seen the condition of the horses. Even more weird - the day that the grey horse was shot by the RSPCA one of these two kind souls was actually there, with the mare and cried buckets for her needless loss. 

Small world!

So, I had seen these people before, I just didn't actually SEE them!  If you know what I mean!  In the heat of emotion of a horse's life ending, its amazing where our senses and emotions turn and what else they blind us to.  Anger, rage, loss, despair blind us to the love and compassion that is there at the same time!

Quote from The World Is a Safe Place by Jim White

This chance encounter has restored my faith in people and  in mankind.  I used this example in a conversation with a friend on the phone last night.  I was trying to find words to explain how I am learning (these last few months) that as Lao Tzu says ...

"you have to know darkness in order to enjoy light" 

(this is my translation of his words) 

Without darkness, bad, evil, or problems, there can be no opposite; light, goodness, kindness, and solutions.  We have to push through the darkness, create our own path with the right intentions behind it, and have faith that the light will be there to shine when we come out the other side.    

My experiences over the last 3 months suggest that I'm not sure you actually have to have a lot of faith in the first place, but perhaps as long as you have compassion and respect for life, faith will find you!   

There is an inspirational book called The World Is A Safe Place by Jim White, from whom I have taken the title of this post.  Its a great inspirational read of images, quotes and concepts.  It's based on a true story. 

www.theworldisasafeplace.com

Here are just a few of the powerfully thought provoking images and messages you'll find on the website and in his book.

Over the last 3 weeks, I've posted a lot about one thing: MIRACLES!  Be that the health issues with myself and my mother, that have miraculously fixed, healed or simply disappeared.  Or the miraculous amount of help offered by total strangers to help me feed horses in need.  Finally the miracle of the World being a Safe Place.  

Other amazing things are happening right now, which i'll share as they unfold.  I for one, never expected to be writing about miracles, let alone believing in them!

The Hallmark of An Action Plan

"Whatever is flexible and living will tend to grow; 

 

 whatever is rigid and blocked will wither and die."

-   Lao Tzu (ancient Chinese philosopher)

Essy's Medical update

"FLEXIBILITY is the name of the game" if we are to bend, not break, like Bamboo in the wind, and adjust to what life has waiting for us!

In business leadership the nimble skill of weathering a recession or expanding into new markets requires a level of improvisation and therefore flexibility.

Is instinct the same as improvisation?  Can one be born from the other?

Over the last 2 years, Ive resisted as long as I could any operation on Essy to further diagnose the source of his one nostril nose bleeds, led largely by my instinct in opposition with my vet.

The only operation (last summer) he has had so far, which did entail drilling a hole in between his eyes did not reach the source of the nose bleed.  Did not diagnose the problem.  It was of no help whatsoever.  The biopsy was inconclusive.  It cost money that the insurance company wouldn't cover as the nose bleeds were ongoing, but most importantly it put my boy through an inevitable massive headache, trauma to his head and face, four weeks of box rest and a bandage round his face with the risk of infection in mid August when we had the hottest weather for ages.  

I was not expecting them to drill that day.  They were supposed to be re-scoping and coming back to me (and my friend waiting anxiously in the vets office) to discuss what to do next.  You've never seen two more shocked humans than us two when we were invited back to see what they had found.  What we saw was their fingers inside Essy's head, together with a long tube and camera.  My friend left quickly out and I hung on in struggling to be brave for Essy. (Proof again, I am a coward)! 

Now, 6 months on, I made the decision to have a CT Scan to see if once and for all we could determine the nature of the problem.  To be truthful my biggest fear was that it wouldn't help much and in a way that fear has come true.

1. There is no tumour (good news)
2. There is however an Ethmoid Hematoma. 
3. Problem is it is in an 'unusual' location so surgery to remove it will be very 'challenging' said the RVC vet who specialises in this surgery and does it often.  At least two holes will need to be drilled into his head, one below his left eye, the other will be re-opened from last summer.
4. Normally there is another option for dealing with these EH's i.e. to drain them by scoping, and injecting into the EH Formalin, once every week over a period of weeks.
5. The problem is that the location of Essy' means this isn't an option for us.  The ET is touching against the cribriform plate which is against the brain.  Should Formalin enter the brain seizures or worse could result.

So Essy and I now have to live out the reality of needing to adjust and respond appropriately to each new day and changing situation, symptom or diagnosis.  Given that our situation is kind of new, (for us and the vets) it seems pointless looking for ‘tick-box’ solutions or trying to “do it by the book”.  I am not against vets or their advice.  I do not know better (far from it).   But nothing about my own life or that of my horses is 'text book material' so why would I expect any of our challenges to fall neatly into a "Manual of How To....?" Deep down I still believe Essy's nose bleeds has an emotional link.

Our ability to adapt and embrace flexibility is an important reason we have survived as human beings. Unfortunately, as people move into positions of authority and power, this natural capability often becomes compromised. It starts to atrophy, replaced by more rigid thinking, a reliance on systems, procedures and bureaucracies.  My challenge now is to be flexible in my thinking and stay nimble and able to adapt.

 

“It is not the strongest of the species that survives,

 nor the most intelligent,

 it is the one that is most adaptable to change.”

- Charles Darwin (Naturalist)

My plan of action has three parts:

1. - Have an overall plan
2. - Remain "present", day by day
3. - Be ready to change the plan!

My own stress level management programme is always facilitated if I have a plan and can start to action it.   However, the need for loving Essy each day with all my heart means I have to stay present, more than ever before.  Without an "in the moment" mindset we can't fight this things with love, healing, joy and the shear will to live.  In stead I think we are left fighting from fear, dread and pain.

The Hallmarks (defined as 'distinguishing characters and features') of my Plan so far are:-

Step 1: The power of now! A renewed focus on being present, in the moment

Step 2: Distant Healing from a dear friend who has offered her love and help

Step 3: Reiki as often as we can ideally weekly as a minimum

Step 4: Self Selection of Herbs and Oils to support him - with the help of Naturally Animals and iridologist Catherine Edwards

Step 5: James Hart tonics  - to be explored which could help, if any

Step 6: Red light therapy - although I'm not sure where to put it as the EH is deep in his head.  What is clear is that the location where the vets thought it was (below his eye) is NOT the right place.  Funny thing is that every time I've put the light there, believing it might be doing some good, Essy has uncharacteristically, not stood still, not been happy.  My god did he know all along it was the wrong spot?

Step 7: A three way talk with Margrit (in the diary) to check on headaches, discomfort and to openly talk about giving me signs that things aren't good.  Fear of not having an open line of communication will be the only thing that gets me through that conversation and the floods of tears that are sure to rain down on us.
 
Step 8: Reflection; daily! I will need more than ever to develop reflection.  To learn to reflect more on what is happening in the moment.... As reflection does not come naturally to me, again I revert to a plan of 'how I will do that'.

So far, it looks like consciously thinking about, sensing, and tuning into ....

• What is happening right now?
• How am I/ is Essy feeling in this moment and why?
• What is not being said?
• What is his body language telling me?
• What I am feeling inside my body?
• What ideas, thoughts or feelings or images are coming to mind at the moment?
• What are others sensing, picking up on right now?
• How are my other horses behaving towards Essy?
• What is the state of his general health, coat condition, skin, hair, muscle tone, curiosity levels, appetite, and activity levels telling me?
• What do I, and what does he, want to create - right now?

Step 9: Living Positively:  I want to build into my plan, trips out.  In hand as I retired him on February 10th 2013 at his request.  Can we go to the New Forest again?  The beach?  A forge?  What great trips out can we plan at home or away?  I already know we'll picnic in the field as we did last summer after his head drilling escapade.  My wonderful music teacher is coming to visit the horses in the field and play her Alpine Horn, I may do a little trilling on the flute! Its about looking for the light in each day, following the fun, lingering in laughter, and keeping our minds stimulated with the new.


Beyond that, the plan hasn't yet developed, but then I haven't gone around that next corner yet, to see what's ahead.  Any offers of advise or guidance will be greatly received before I drive accidentally off the skid pan and into obscurity!