Some time ago a friend declared "this dressage is easy - you just kick and pull!"
There are often defining
moments in life, maybe in our riding too. For me hearing the above words, was one such
moment. I was totally at odds with what I was hearing. I had no belief
in it whatsoever. It was not how I saw riding as described or demonstrated by the old Masters; my heroes. To be fair to my friend it was making a positive difference in how her horse was going. Will it last? Will there be adverse consequences on his body? I don't know.
Sadly
I suspect most of us (and most judges) see a lot of pulling, holding
and kicking by riders. It has become the norm, but it never used to
be. It is certainly not the only way to ride. I would argue it is also not THE way
to ride. However, if it is all that we see, or all that is taught, it becomes accepted and
suddenly we stop asking if there's an alternative; another way.
The
more you think about it the more abhorrent it sounds to believe that
riding is about pulling and kicking. When we pull we are pulling on a
living animals very sensitive mouth using a piece of unforgiving metal.
When we kick we use weight laden legs, with or without metal spiking
spurs, to boot the horses fragile ribs. How can this be
dressage? How can this be a loving way of being with our so called 'best
friend'. It certainly isn't 'ballet'!
I think the point is that we have a choice about how we ride and if a trainer suggests a way that makes us recoil, we owe it to ourselves to seek an alternative.
I think the point is that we have a choice about how we ride and if a trainer suggests a way that makes us recoil, we owe it to ourselves to seek an alternative.
A lot of what we hear others say makes no sense if you stop to really think about it! We so easily become
full of "BS", taking on other people's words and
beliefs. As a simple example how often have you heard a horse person say its
"good for horses to be worked hard"! Is that really true? How do we know? Why is
it good for them? Who says anyway - the horse? If someone said to me 'its good for you to
work hard' I'd tell them where to go!
Isn't it arrogant to think we know what someone else's (human or horse) needs are, and it's quite ridiculous to think animals value WORK in the same way we might! Only humans could think like that!
To notice how engrained a belief can be (for example about hard work) here are a few of the popular sayings that you might recognise. These sayings become our beliefs because we hear them or say them over and over again. It shapes what we do and how we behave.
Which do you find yourself automatically agreeing with as if it is the LAW! When did you last revisit that belief? Have you considered it might not be so?
Isn't it arrogant to think we know what someone else's (human or horse) needs are, and it's quite ridiculous to think animals value WORK in the same way we might! Only humans could think like that!
To notice how engrained a belief can be (for example about hard work) here are a few of the popular sayings that you might recognise. These sayings become our beliefs because we hear them or say them over and over again. It shapes what we do and how we behave.
Which do you find yourself automatically agreeing with as if it is the LAW! When did you last revisit that belief? Have you considered it might not be so?
I
would suggest that many of the above don't even suit our own human needs, never mind a horse. If it did then we would just have to work harder to produce our
best results. Yet many of us find it isn't as simple as that. If we do have 'peak's
in our performance it can be difficult to sustain, often we don't know how we did it in the first place! Ultimately, too much work and we burn out, become jaded and lose motivation. Why else do we crave holidays when we get to
"re-fresh, rejuvenate and re-connect" with what is important in life -
which for most of us, isn't work!
As a sports coach I am often asked by riders how they can improve and perform more consistently. Hard work is never the first answer, although practice, preparation etc will be key ingredients for sure.
From sports science and masses of business research into how humans achieve and excel, we know that the desired "state" we need to be in to produce our maximum performance level is called "flow" and equates to our attention being at its peak. (Stress levels will also be low, not high). This is the moment when we achieve our personal best and it has 3 ingredients:
Think of the moment you first kissed someone you've had your eye on for a while - everything else becomes a blur and it feels fab (assuming you can both kiss well) - that's focus!
This is the state we have to achieve to produce our personal best. It won't feel like hard work, it feels great! It is unlikely to be a 'state' we can maintain for 7 hours a day or repeat every day. It ebbs and flows. Why else is outlook programmed to default meeting settings to 15 or 30 minutes in duration? It mirrors the reality of being able to stay in a period of 'focus' for short periods only.
Too much hard work and what can happen is that if we have too much to do, too little support or feel pressurized then our performance drops off and our stress levels rise. We do not perform to the best of our ability. We beat ourselves up and the cycle gets worse.
Add to that emotions and if our emotions are too strong or unguided, they overwhelm us and take over all other facets including our attention, and therefore our ability to perform at our best.
No where in my belief system does it say I believe we humans have to be slaves to a work ethic dictated to us by someone else. I don't believe it should be that way for our horses either. So, back to our horse riding, here are some key questions to think about when working our horses if we want to bring out the best in them:
Q) What do we do to ensure our horses don't feel their work is unguided, overwhelming and stressful?
Q) What do we do to help them get into their ideal 'state' for them be attentive (in flow)?
Q) How do we keep their attention (positively)?
Q) How do we set them up to show us what they can do naturally (their talents)?
Q) Does schooling or hacking or anything we do with them look as if it feels good to them?
As a sports coach I am often asked by riders how they can improve and perform more consistently. Hard work is never the first answer, although practice, preparation etc will be key ingredients for sure.
From sports science and masses of business research into how humans achieve and excel, we know that the desired "state" we need to be in to produce our maximum performance level is called "flow" and equates to our attention being at its peak. (Stress levels will also be low, not high). This is the moment when we achieve our personal best and it has 3 ingredients:
1 - our attention is so absorbed we don't see or hear things around us - spectators, noises etc.
2 -it is the moment where we call upon our skills to shine
and
3 - it is a physiological state that feels good!
Think of the moment you first kissed someone you've had your eye on for a while - everything else becomes a blur and it feels fab (assuming you can both kiss well) - that's focus!
This is the state we have to achieve to produce our personal best. It won't feel like hard work, it feels great! It is unlikely to be a 'state' we can maintain for 7 hours a day or repeat every day. It ebbs and flows. Why else is outlook programmed to default meeting settings to 15 or 30 minutes in duration? It mirrors the reality of being able to stay in a period of 'focus' for short periods only.
Too much hard work and what can happen is that if we have too much to do, too little support or feel pressurized then our performance drops off and our stress levels rise. We do not perform to the best of our ability. We beat ourselves up and the cycle gets worse.
Add to that emotions and if our emotions are too strong or unguided, they overwhelm us and take over all other facets including our attention, and therefore our ability to perform at our best.
No where in my belief system does it say I believe we humans have to be slaves to a work ethic dictated to us by someone else. I don't believe it should be that way for our horses either. So, back to our horse riding, here are some key questions to think about when working our horses if we want to bring out the best in them:
Q) What do we do to ensure our horses don't feel their work is unguided, overwhelming and stressful?
Q) What do we do to help them get into their ideal 'state' for them be attentive (in flow)?
Q) How do we keep their attention (positively)?
Q) How do we set them up to show us what they can do naturally (their talents)?
Q) Does schooling or hacking or anything we do with them look as if it feels good to them?
Coming up with questions is only part of the equation, the easier part! Finding the answers is more challenging. Being willing to try, will help us develop into more open, aware and 'able-minded' people. Thus avoiding the habit of saying stuff that makes no sense at all or isn't true.
After all, what we say influences what we do!
Sadly
we do tend to go around just saying "stuff" all day long that we don't
think about, don't take responsibility for and often don't know why we
are saying it in the first place. The danger is that the words we use shape and influence our attitude and reflects our inner beliefs, that will continue to go un-questioned, if we never stop to listen to ourselves. Nor do we take the opportunity to examine what's working and why?
Beliefs are formed by the age of 7. Many of those beliefs served us well as kids, but actually work against us achieving a simple happy life as adults. We just never realise it! As an example, a young woman I know was raised to be 'silent' 'seen and not heard'. She had to be in bed by 6pm when her father returned home from work. She learned the skills of being silent, and moving around like a stealth bomber - aged just 6! That was how she survived with a violent and explosive cruel partner. It served her well.
The problem is that now, later in life, as a grown up adult, she struggles to be assertive especially if it means raising her voice, or causing 'upset'. Her childhood belief about 'good girls sitting still and quiet' are holding her back in relationships. Her belief no longer serves her well.
Going forward often starts with a backwards step. When we examine and change our beliefs it is helpful to remember their source. Our beliefs will always make sense when we go back to when they formed. Only then can we ask if that belief is one to keep in our tool kit today.
In summary, if we are to wake up and be more aware, and present for our horses, to let them bring out the best in us, we have to start paying attention to what we say, and what others say before we agree with them.
This is the difference between being awake or asleep; conscious or unconscious; steering your life or being on auto-pilot, and as Joyce Davis's says in her book...
Beliefs are formed by the age of 7. Many of those beliefs served us well as kids, but actually work against us achieving a simple happy life as adults. We just never realise it! As an example, a young woman I know was raised to be 'silent' 'seen and not heard'. She had to be in bed by 6pm when her father returned home from work. She learned the skills of being silent, and moving around like a stealth bomber - aged just 6! That was how she survived with a violent and explosive cruel partner. It served her well.
The problem is that now, later in life, as a grown up adult, she struggles to be assertive especially if it means raising her voice, or causing 'upset'. Her childhood belief about 'good girls sitting still and quiet' are holding her back in relationships. Her belief no longer serves her well.
Going forward often starts with a backwards step. When we examine and change our beliefs it is helpful to remember their source. Our beliefs will always make sense when we go back to when they formed. Only then can we ask if that belief is one to keep in our tool kit today.
In summary, if we are to wake up and be more aware, and present for our horses, to let them bring out the best in us, we have to start paying attention to what we say, and what others say before we agree with them.
This is the difference between being awake or asleep; conscious or unconscious; steering your life or being on auto-pilot, and as Joyce Davis's says in her book...
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