Strange Affairs of the Heart

Is it synchronicity or just a lucky coincidence when you find out one morning that one of your beloved horses has a heart issue, then later that day, you randomly grab a book to read on route to the train station, to find it's all about the heart, energy, chi, love and awareness?

The "untethered soul" appeared today just when I needed it.  It helped me shift from devastated and fearful to hopeful and strangely calm.

I have decided that Solar Sue's heart condition will be treated with healing, love, and visualisations to help her release whatever it is that needs to be cleared.   I must be honest, I don't yet know what is her 'condition'.  All I know is that on Monday when I booked my vet to take her bloods (to find out if there was some underlying cause of her weight loss) he found an abnormality in her heart beat.  I listened too, and it scared me to death!

Between Solar Sue and Essy I am finally coming to a conclusion that their 'illnesses' which seem always to break the norms according to the vets, is a message for me!  I seem to be on a journey with them to either learn a lot about non-veterinary methods, or learn the wonder of miracles and a horses ability to nudge back towards health.  The concept of 'less is more' is at the forefront of my mind and could be applied to many aspects of my life not just my horses health.

At the heart of this new sense of  'direction', captured I hope through Essy's Blog, is a foundation stone of self-healing, trust, waking up, peacefulness, acceptance and gratitude. I don't have a handy label for all that but maybe in time one will come (if needed).

Here's what I was reminded of as I read two chapters of the Untethered Soul on the train on Monday:

We live with a certain amount of fear - that's normal.  Fear generated from our thoughts and feelings.

We know that when certain things happen our fears can be triggered and flare up.

We get  totally absorbed in our inner world of thoughts and feelings that we end up living life on 'auto-pilot' ( a subject of previous posts on this blog).

Our thoughts, beliefs, memories - all require energy,  to create them, store them, re-live and re-play them.

This inner energy doesn't come from food, diet, or sleep - it comes from being in love, being afraid as examples. 

It is internal within us, which means it is available to us anytime, anyplace.

So far so good, but what does all this mean?  Why did this calm me down about Solars heart?

What if we all have the ability to open or block access to this inner source of energy?  What if, we block it every time we close our heart or our mind?  What if every time we deny our instincts, our passions, our desires, we are shutting up shop, so to speak?  Over time would you expect your heart to be strong, youthful, healthy?

When Margrit visited Essy on March 1st  this year, (one year after they first met) one of the first things he told her was 'how Solar's energy had returned'.  What if most of last year when Solar had not been fully herself - her heart was closed, hence her energy down?  

How would I have recognised the symptoms?  How would I have known this was going on inside her? What could I have done?

I think that until we are ready to face the answers to these questions, the only answer available to us is ... "we can't"... not yet!

For example, as a comparison with last year - I only recently (2 weeks ago) purchased  The Untethered Soul.  Last year my blog was not where it is today in terms of its messages of awakening.  Last year I didn't have the results for Essy's nose bleeds and didn't know that we would be heading into a land where the vets can't actually treat his hematoma,  leaving me with no choice (other than doing nothing), than to pursue non veterinary prescribed routes.

None of this was in my reality.  I couldn't have answered any 'what if' questions at that stage.

To return to Solar Sue and her heart.  Last summer I was worried about Solar - her weight fell off, she stopped eating hay, she was quiet and stood by the gate during the day.  She would nicker deeply into my stomach when I walked at her side - like a protective brood mare to her foal, which made no sense to me at all.

Then when we moved yards in October 2013, she seemed to bounce back to life.  She has been perky, active, full of life and her coat has gleamed all winter.  Her eye is sparkly and only her weight loss has been a worry.   I hope I can be forgiven for thinking we were 'getting back on track'.

So, to return to the thoughts that spoke to me from the book I grabbed, I began to question what is the link between our minds, our hearts and this inner energy source?  I'll try to explain...

We are blocked when we are depressed.

We are open when we are happy.

We are blocked when we are afraid.

We are open when we are in love.

When happy or in love we tend to feel in a good mood, almost constantly!  We are trusting towards others, we even reveal our vulnerabilities to them. However, as soon as the romance or happy glow wares off because something bad happens, or our lover says something unkind, we begin to be on guard.  We begin to withdraw or hold back.  We wait.  We self protect.  This feeling and our subsequent behaviours can deepen rapidly as we begin to notice other things that upset us, hurt us or sadden us.  Suddenly all we notice is the rubbish stuff in life, all around us, wherever we look, and we feel fed up, tired, disengaged and demotivated. Now, even getting out of bed can feel like an effort, 'why bother', we ask ourselves?

This is what can happen when we close our mind to a person, object, situation, place or possibility, and our heart and energy follow accordingly.   For some, it could become an easy comfortable and familiar place to rest a while! Perhaps Solar found herself in such a place last year, for whatever reason.

Equally, one great hack on our horse, one smile from a handsome stranger, one piece of unexpected good news and we begin to feel ourselves bounce back!  We get a smile back on our face, we expect a car parking space to open up for us and it does, and life is good again!

No magic pills, diet or vaccination - mind, heart and energy all begin to open back up or close down, based on our thoughts and feelings.

From Yoga we know that the heart is an energy centre or chakra. Who is to say that our horses don't experience a similar cycle of thoughts, feelings, and energy surge or slip?  A closed heart and low energy could easily result from depression, anxiety, physical pain, abuse, containment, loneliness, overwork,  etc. 

Is that possible in a horse? I believe so.  

Is it probable?  Why ever not? 

After all aren't horses supposed to be even more sensitive that us humans?

They are more finely tuned to nature, their five senses are more powerful, they have a physicality that is tuned into every aspect of nature not just what they can see or hear or smell or touch?  They sense our moods, our thoughts, our fears.  They pick up on our heart beat, any source of disease and emotional upset.  Hardly the characteristics of hardened beast of burden and nothing more!

From Solar's visit with Margrit 12 months ago, there were things that suggested she felt a sense of loss for horse friends she is no longer in touch with.  A sense of dependence upon others in her life to stay in her life.  In my words ' a sensitive soul living for love'.

As I reflect on the last 12 months, she has had the least of my time, energy and attention.  Both Essy and Grace had health issues last year from May onwards.

Now, it is her time and she has waited long enough.

I do believe that 'you have to be the change you want to see' and the Untethered Soul has helped encourage me to question where I might need to focus my attention, thoughts, feelings and energy in order to help Solar.  Specifically I wondered: 

'how much love do I want Solar to feel from me?' 

 Answer: Masses!  All the love I can muster, so I must be conscious of that.

'how much am I giving off an energy that says to her, I am enjoying life, you can too?' 

Answer:  I have good days and bad days - so I need to be aware of which it is when around her!

'how much JOY do I show her I am feeling when I'm in her company?'

Answer: I've not actually thought about it like that, till now!

Bottom line  is that to feel love, enthusiasm, joy etc. or not, is a choice we all have. We can decide to be open or elect to be closed.  We just don't know we have this choice or that it is so simple!  We aren't taught it.  We don't stop to think about it and when we do it's either too simplistic to be credible or too deep to fathom! 

For Solar Sue, while I wait for veterinary input into a possible diagnosis, prognosis etc of her heart problem, I have decided to CHOOSE to be OPEN.  I have begun to offer her Bergamot and Rose Otto essential oils, I have sat quietly in a meditative pose in her stable to visualise her heart and energy opening, and clearing.  I have worked with the red light on her heart meridian and ordered specific herbs for her heart - arriving on Monday.

... (I had to do something)!

As I've assembled my oils, light and myself for an evening 'healing' session with her (that's my term for it) she has stood at liberty, breathing deeply, eyes closing.  Two nights ago she kept turning her head into my tummy and doing her soft, deep nicker from last year, that I still don't understand but which moved me to tears.  

The bond of love a human can feel towards a horse is utterly without word or expression, but somehow tears seem to capture it well.

I do believe that together she and I are doing some good for her future and beginning to heal whatever needs to be healed and clear whatever needs to be cleared. I have a feeling I have more to learn and my horses will be showing me the way. As we take that road to 'I don't know where' I want to give Solar new positive impressions for her heart to balance against any stored up old indentations that she may be holding onto.

Please wish us luck on the way!

A quote from The Untethered Soul:

"Unending inspiration, unending love, and unending openness. 

That is the natural state of a healthy heart"  

 

Energy Matters...

"The truth dazzles gradually, or else the world would be blind" 

 

- Emily Dickenson 

I was 14 when I first wondered "how do humans and horses connect?"  "How do horses know what to do when we move a leg forward or backwards against their side as we ride?'  How do they know we want them to canter versus turn right or left?  How can such small movements by the rider be understood by a horse?

Trainers tell me its a combination of repetition of requests, positive reinforcement when the horse gets it right, and correct use of pressure and release.  All very logical. Yet, in dressage the human movements are so subtle and sometimes differentiated by just millimetres that I wonder if its really all about physical actions or is something else contributing to how we connect? 

Arthur C. Clark wrote "any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic" - is there a technology to riding?  For sure there are plenty of technical aspects to be learnt in riding, and many riders do learn the aids, proper position etc yet they don't always achieve the magical results we see at demos, or top level competitions.  It seems technique alone isn't enough!

Many of us search for that missing 'X Factor' beyond technique and can end up exploring extremes testing the limits of what a technique can deliver and what it can not. Examples include using special bridles, head collars, ropes, whips and other man made gadgets or abandoning it all in favour of working our horses using only our breath, energy or being 'at liberty'.  All extremes in action!

In developing my connection with my own horses I have to keep reminding myself that they are horses!

Sounds a little crazy I know, but it helps to re-focus me away from "technique-ing" my way through every situation.  Horses, we know are prey animals but to remember this means we must accept that unpredictability comes with working with them. So, it makes sense for us to have a variety of approaches at our disposal so we are flexible in which we use, in any given situation.

So if 'technique' is only half the equation? What makes up the rest?

What if ....energy is the missing ingredient?  At least that would be good news to those of us on a budget - it comes free of charge, doesn't need a license to use, and is available to anyone!

In quantum physics the concept of Zero-point energy, is the lowest possible energy something can have. With our horses this is not something we often explore, to our detriment. If we can be aware of energy levels (as if they travel from us to our horses like 'waves'), means we could (with practise) consciously manage our flow of energy; learning to bring it down, maintain it, or take it up as needed. (See earlier blog: Experts on; Experts off, or Hard Work Nonsense).

To practise working with Zero point energy, take hold of an orange in your hand.  Then focus your attention on using less energy to hold it.  Use the absolute least amount of energy possible. Then widen your practice to include how you grip objects and how you get in and out of a chair - using as little of yourself and your energy as possible!

Our ability to tap into energy could be our best way of being able to mirror, match and lead our horses to a place of physical, mental and emotional relaxation, and connection with us. Then transfer this to the saddle (See earlier post: Ghandi Inspired Riding).

Could energy be the missing ingredient in the ultimate connection between horse and human? Could the answer to some of the following questions be found in working with energy?...

1. Has my horse checked out mentally or is he/she playing games when on the lunge? What does the difference look and feel like?
2. Is he/she paying enough attention to me to pick up on any small change in 'me' that I make? Or, am I invisible to him?
3. Am I being consistent? Clear? Is my timing good? 
4. Is my energy low, medium or high? How do I know?  Does my horse notice the difference?
5. Do my horses believe me; my requests,  believe and trust in me? 
6. Do I change my energy when I get the right response from my horse?
7. Can I consciously change and direct my energy?

In my Parelli work I'm encouraged  to work with the concept of "Chi" (life force/energy) to learn to bring it up, or down.  A typical practical application is to bring your Chi up before asking for an upward transition.  "Belly breathing" means we can do the very same when in the saddle.

Just as the universe gives us lots of 'clues' about the direction to take (or not) in life, we can give energetic clues to make it easy for our horse to do the right thing when we ask, BEFORE we ask it.  That's a concept I like.  Sounds fair, compassionate and ethical (a subject for another blog, another day)!

I love watching out for signs in my horses of a lack of even, consistent energy flow. Grace jumping into trot suggests she hasn't worked out yet how to do that transition smoothly. Her body must have tension in it.  She could of course lack physical strength too. Rather than 'get at her' or get frustrated with my own skills, thinking about energy means I have a new language to explore: "Is her energy forwards enough? Is she thinking forwards? Where is my energy sending her and how?"

I love the synchronicity of the concept of working with energy even as I write.  For the last week my own energy level has raised (consciously) by some amazing yoga, meditation work and reiki while on holiday in Mauritius.  As if to match that energetic change in me, life has already opened up some great new opportunities in a matter of days.

Taking the time to connect with a bigger energy field in me and in the environment around and observing my breath without trying to change it, are great experiences to bring back and apply with my horse work.  It began today!

Holidays are rejuvenating. They provide a rare opportunity for us to slow down and recover our mental and physical energy.  In yoga we learn that tension is your enemy.  To get a deeper stretch we have to accept, breathe and relax.

Yoga is a whole body and mind experience. It is a very personal journey.  In Tai Chi we slow all our movements down to almost slow motion pace. If we want our horses to think all the way down to their feet, to move through stress and to be responsible for manoeuvring obstacles, then moving our own energy around, and eradicating any physical tension must be of benefit in helping our horse to do the same, while we are together.

Horse training means making sure we have the 'whoa and the go' firmly in place before we embark on riding! My priority is checking out the brakes; half halts, disengaging the hind quarters etc. But, can we do the same within ourselves? Can we easily change direction or perspective, or do we always watch TV from the same chair?  Can we easily stop and do less? Give in to do nothing? Stop thinking and focus on our breathing only? Try it for 15 seconds! It is hard!

Parelli and Yoga both honour the principles of starting where you start, work slowly and progressively- accepting where you are and not comparing yourself with others. It's the journey not the destination!

I'm convinced as we evolve in our understanding of horses, and as we wake up to a higher level of self awareness, that working with energy will become an 'old fashioned' tool that every horseman uses.  In the words of Einstein...

"No problem can be solved from the same level of consciousness that created it"

... which I hope means there's more to discover that will take us beyond working with energy into new realms we aren't even yet considering - except in our imagination!

Are Horses Intuitive?

A 'timely' Bank Holiday chat!

I spent time tonight, with a fellow livery hand grazing our horses enjoying the last rays of a balmy august evening, the sun setting in a dusky pink surround.

Out of the blue she commented on how "happy" she thought her horse was. Not that she believed he was normally unhappy, "but" she went on to explain it "wasn't a look, or anything in particular it was just a feeling... a sense that at this moment in his life he was particularly content".

I was struck with the timeliness of her words given that I've spent time today considering if horses are intuitive. Now, here was a lady explaining her own intuition at work.

Maybe that's how it works this intuition thing - we simply get a sense about someone, something, or a place that informs us - for no reason other than we believe it to be the case, with or without evidence to back it up. When we get that sense it sits right, it feels right, it resonates as true and we speak it as if it is so. That is intuition at work.

Are horses capable of a similar process? Why ever not? Our dogs wait at home by the front door apparently sensing when we are about to return. Cats are renown for sensing our negative emotion and absorbing it to help relieve our emotional pain.  So why on earth couldn't a domesticated horse, whose life is so entwined with ours and who is so 'plugged into nature' - not possess similar intuitive ability?

Do horses have hunches?  I'm not the expert. I am sure they sense our 'intention'; they know if someone's intent is positive, loving, helpful or not as they approach!  They seem to know when we are there to help them - if tied up in a fence line, snarled in a rug strap, or in physical pain.

They know when to be careful, even slow moving and gentle around young children, or the elderly.  Even the arrival of a puppy or kitten on a yard can bring out the 'delicate side' of a strapping warm blood!

So how do we explain an apparent change in character of a normally flighty, spooky horse into one calm enough to carry a 3 year child?

I'm sure there are some who would suggest horses are creatures of great observation, nothing more than that.  I would agree with that view point, as any prey animal will need strong powers of observation to survive. I don't subscribe to it being the whole story though - although who is to say that intuition is nothing more than 'high' powers of observation? 

Essy 2010

I'm not advocating that horse intuition is something ethereal or mystical.

On the one hand I think that because they operate with a wonderful simplicity, being present, living moment to moment and not worrying about later today, or next week, does help them to pick up on vibes, energy or whatever it is that informs intuition, being it is a very in the moment event.

Being in such a consistent space, responding to what's in front of them now, must free up mental capacity leaving space for intuitive skills to develop.  I suspect this is why so many of us (unlike our horses) are so out of touch with our intuition - having comparatively less 'free mental disc space' in our brains.

Surely intuition in a horse is no less probable than the phenomena of deaf or blind people reporting heightened acuity in other functioning senses, or elephants sensing water through vibrations in their feet.

Up to date research has now proved that human thoughts can be measured and are known to have a physical 'strength' - tangible and quantifiable.  Therefore it seems that pretty much any living organism (including plants) sense vibrational energy in words, thoughts and intent.

Given that all 'things' are actually moving and vibrating (see movie What the Bleep) with more space in them than actual matter - it's no big stretch of the imagination to consider horses pick up on all these vibrations and use their intuition to respond.

We too, have the same ability (dormant or active) if we want to see beyond the obvious and look at the spaces between the notes!

"Simples"... Right?