I want to explore further this concept of being with Essy without having an agenda. It was one of his important messages to me and to all humans who interact with horses.
On first thought an agenda to me means two things; needing to get certain stuff done and in a set time. The most obvious frame of reference for me is my 27 years working in Corporate Life.
Intuitively I understand that being without an agenda around horses is linked to being present. But I don't yet know how to do it!
My journey towards 'being and presence' starts with 'time'. Time is a man-made concept which works against us and locks us out of being present much like a pair of handcuffs restricts our movement. When we focus on time 'what' becomes more important than 'why not'. Time is after all an illusion - once upon a time it didn't exist it wasn't invented.
There have been days with Essy 'post Margrit's' visit when I've found myself arriving with the usual list of 'to do's' - grooming, hand grazing, herb self selection, feet care, clean his grooming brushes, wash his rugs etc. Having three horses the daily 'agenda' can get pretty full in a hurry!
The key seems to be to learn how to quit focusing solely on the 'what' must be done, even if we still have to be aware of time in order to be home by 8pm.
Post Margrit's visit I have caught myself sometimes thinking " I don't have to groom today" especially if he doesn't seem keen. These moments feel good. Refreshing; liberating. Instead I've asked Essy "what would you like to do?" The result has been agenda abandoned, and we've mooched around the yard together, socialising with other horses over the hay barrow, nibbling on grass verges, or smelling essential oils. It's been fun, relaxing and above all easy.
My 3 Tips for letting go of the Agenda:-
1. Can you easily and with quality of attention, focus on whatever you are doing right now at the exclusion of other distractions?
On first thought an agenda to me means two things; needing to get certain stuff done and in a set time. The most obvious frame of reference for me is my 27 years working in Corporate Life.
Intuitively I understand that being without an agenda around horses is linked to being present. But I don't yet know how to do it!
My journey towards 'being and presence' starts with 'time'. Time is a man-made concept which works against us and locks us out of being present much like a pair of handcuffs restricts our movement. When we focus on time 'what' becomes more important than 'why not'. Time is after all an illusion - once upon a time it didn't exist it wasn't invented.
There have been days with Essy 'post Margrit's' visit when I've found myself arriving with the usual list of 'to do's' - grooming, hand grazing, herb self selection, feet care, clean his grooming brushes, wash his rugs etc. Having three horses the daily 'agenda' can get pretty full in a hurry!
The key seems to be to learn how to quit focusing solely on the 'what' must be done, even if we still have to be aware of time in order to be home by 8pm.
Post Margrit's visit I have caught myself sometimes thinking " I don't have to groom today" especially if he doesn't seem keen. These moments feel good. Refreshing; liberating. Instead I've asked Essy "what would you like to do?" The result has been agenda abandoned, and we've mooched around the yard together, socialising with other horses over the hay barrow, nibbling on grass verges, or smelling essential oils. It's been fun, relaxing and above all easy.
My 3 Tips for letting go of the Agenda:-
Step 1: Remind yourself you have a choice and don't have to DO stuff!
Step 2: Ask your horse (or yourself) "what would you like to do"
Step 3: Open the stable door and see where you both end up!...
...We found ourselves sharing the hay barrow with a friend!
As Eckhart Tolle wrote in 'The Power of Now' "the enlightened person's main
focus of attention is always the Now, but they are still peripherally aware of time".
focus of attention is always the Now, but they are still peripherally aware of time".
I appreciate that Essy is 21 years old and no longer in the zone of working towards competitions, or a level of fitness required to compete in a discipline. After a busy career of polo, endurance racing and dressage he will welcome a 'slow down' but can I? After all our horses are not the ones with the agendas, it's us!
I'm early in my discovery phase but so far I believe even horse and riders competing can benefit when switching to a 'less is more' approach!
I'm early in my discovery phase but so far I believe even horse and riders competing can benefit when switching to a 'less is more' approach!
Will letting go of agendas benefit your relationship with your horse? If you answer 'no' to any or all of these, then the answer is yes!
1. Can you easily and with quality of attention, focus on whatever you are doing right now at the exclusion of other distractions?
2. Do you tend to focus on the goal versus the next step along the way?
3. Does your mental energy go into trying to 'make things' happen instead of accepting where you are or what comes along?
4. Can you stop, enjoy the moment, or do most days pass by in a blur?
5. Does spending time with your horse re-energise you or leave you exhausted?
A testimonial to doing less and watching more with your horse:-
5. Does spending time with your horse re-energise you or leave you exhausted?
A testimonial to doing less and watching more with your horse:-
A friend said only last week about her horse who has been on box rest for 6 months after an injury...
"Ive learnt more about my horse the last few months than in the 8 years prior that we've been together".
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