"When I learned to lick"!
Essy embraced licking at the very end of his talk with Margrit. I've never seen anything like it from him. For one moment I thought he was going to lick her face!!
Since then, he's been making up for lost time! Starting the next day on Monday - licking me while administering herbs in bed - and Ive never been happier....
Today, it was time to lick his new friend Vicki - a Parelli teacher who he 'chose' today to have a lesson with. Seriously funniest thing ever. She had arrived to give Grace (Essy's younger sister) and I our monthly lesson. For some reason Essy caught Vicki's attention (and as I watched from the club house) it was as if she couldn't break out of the hold he had on her. As I approached he and she were still in full 'chat'. Joking she turned to me and said "perhaps Essy would like the lesson today" at which point he nodded so vigorously we both roared with laughter and said "guess that's a yes".
Essy took the lesson and became fascinated in licking his new found friend...
He then showed us just who was in charge - taking a firm hold of the savvy string and later taking the rope in his mouth and leading me around the arena! For nearly two hours we just chilled, hung out as a three some and enjoyed time with no plan, no agenda and no need to do anything in particular. Essy visibly grew more confident, and I had a blast!
Here he is chewing and sucking in the Savvy string until I intervened!
It was another profound day together. A day of talking, listening and acting on what I heard. Can you imagine the insult and hurt he could have felt had Vicki and I ignored his clear wish to 'come out and play' with us? Yet, so often in life we stick to our plans don't we! Putting the plan above the moment. Why? Because a plan is a plan? So what? Plans don't have feelings; because we want to win a rosette or achieve a new level of mastery? What if today I had stuck to my plan - I would have sacrificed showing Essy I'd heard him, sacrificed living the 'no agenda please' message that Essy clearly delivered to Margrit and I on Sunday. I would have shut down a glorious opportunity to just "be" with him. What if I am on probation!? What if each time I ignore him when I have heard him - how many chances do you suppose he will give me? Isn't it sad that we probably do the same thing to our friends and family too!
I have no idea what lies ahead of us, but what a great new start to a 14 year old relationship! I am beginning to wonder if human relationships can benefit from some of the lessons Essy is sharing with me? Could a 14 year old marriage - stale and tired suddenly be re-born and become full of exploration and fun? Are we willing to let go of our agenda? Do we notice those moments where its no longer all about us? Can we be present and in the moment to stop talking or doing and listen to the other person - showing ultimate respect?
Such simple steps that build rapport and trust also lead to greater honesty - something that if missing in a relationship will block the route to true intimacy. Can it be that if we are more in the moment and willing to 'go with the flow' that our lives could be so much more rewarding? What sort of life could we all be living if it was true? A life where the day includes time to play and explore versus striving for achievement and purpose. As a case in point do we even notice when our horses take time out to stand still, and chill out in their paddock or stable? Maybe but do we show respect for that behaviour - and show that we 'get it' ? Or, do we keep grooming, keep mucking out around them, banging and crashing about and pushing their backsides out of our way - as if what we are doing is so very very important!
It shouldn't come as a surprise to me that we can learn so much from our horses, but this is taking me to new places to consider. I am less interested in my horse teaching me how to be assertive or how to notice others challenging me - but I am very interested in how to be a better friend to Essy. Then, maybe I can figure out how to take those same lessons into other relationships in my life.
What fun!
Essy embraced licking at the very end of his talk with Margrit. I've never seen anything like it from him. For one moment I thought he was going to lick her face!!
Since then, he's been making up for lost time! Starting the next day on Monday - licking me while administering herbs in bed - and Ive never been happier....
Essy took the lesson and became fascinated in licking his new found friend...
Here he is chewing and sucking in the Savvy string until I intervened!
It was another profound day together. A day of talking, listening and acting on what I heard. Can you imagine the insult and hurt he could have felt had Vicki and I ignored his clear wish to 'come out and play' with us? Yet, so often in life we stick to our plans don't we! Putting the plan above the moment. Why? Because a plan is a plan? So what? Plans don't have feelings; because we want to win a rosette or achieve a new level of mastery? What if today I had stuck to my plan - I would have sacrificed showing Essy I'd heard him, sacrificed living the 'no agenda please' message that Essy clearly delivered to Margrit and I on Sunday. I would have shut down a glorious opportunity to just "be" with him. What if I am on probation!? What if each time I ignore him when I have heard him - how many chances do you suppose he will give me? Isn't it sad that we probably do the same thing to our friends and family too!
I have no idea what lies ahead of us, but what a great new start to a 14 year old relationship! I am beginning to wonder if human relationships can benefit from some of the lessons Essy is sharing with me? Could a 14 year old marriage - stale and tired suddenly be re-born and become full of exploration and fun? Are we willing to let go of our agenda? Do we notice those moments where its no longer all about us? Can we be present and in the moment to stop talking or doing and listen to the other person - showing ultimate respect?
Such simple steps that build rapport and trust also lead to greater honesty - something that if missing in a relationship will block the route to true intimacy. Can it be that if we are more in the moment and willing to 'go with the flow' that our lives could be so much more rewarding? What sort of life could we all be living if it was true? A life where the day includes time to play and explore versus striving for achievement and purpose. As a case in point do we even notice when our horses take time out to stand still, and chill out in their paddock or stable? Maybe but do we show respect for that behaviour - and show that we 'get it' ? Or, do we keep grooming, keep mucking out around them, banging and crashing about and pushing their backsides out of our way - as if what we are doing is so very very important!
It shouldn't come as a surprise to me that we can learn so much from our horses, but this is taking me to new places to consider. I am less interested in my horse teaching me how to be assertive or how to notice others challenging me - but I am very interested in how to be a better friend to Essy. Then, maybe I can figure out how to take those same lessons into other relationships in my life.
What fun!
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